Pulkit Sharma
Dealing with loss is a daunting experience – it is something that shakes up even a usually resilient person. We struggle hard to process what happens and to come to terms with it. It is during these times that some of us become anxious, depressed and develop complex psychological disorders.
Loss is an inevitable part of life. There are testing times in life when death takes away a person we love, a once-intimate relationship becomes sour, an accident or illness debilitates our body and mind, a long-cherished dream comes crashing down, or a valued possession is snatched away from us. At such moments, we feel helpless and hopeless. It seems as if a black hole has entered our existence, and it gets tough to bounce back to life.
Thirukkural, an ancient Tamil text written almost 2,000 years ago by the sage-philosopher Thiruvalluvar, shows us a profound way to overcome loss. Thiruvalluvar does not consider human suffering to be illusory or trivial. He is empathetic, compassionate and insightful when dealing with issues such as family dynamics, social behavior, immorality, lack of self-control, emotional turmoil, romantic relationships, separation and grief. He connects to people who are at different levels of psychological and emotional maturity and encourages them to move forward. This also makes him a psychotherapist par excellence.
We are told that by becoming aware of the impermanence of various aspects of existence, we can renounce our desires and attachments and move closer to truth. On this path, we realise that a loss is an opening through which we can question our superficial sense of pleasure and pain and move towards something better.
Thiruvalluvar says that money, fortune, possessions and relationships are, by nature, ephemeral and therefore we should never form a dependency on them. We must learn to find our happiness both in their absence and in their presence by using them for collective and altruistic endeavours. Likewise, we should remember that we are not a physical body or a psychological entity, but an eternal soul and live life with this knowledge.
As we practise all this, we understand that the problem lies in our self-centeredness. When we give up our egocentric desires and false identity we reach an inner space where there is no ‘I’ or ‘mine.’ According to the sage, this state is full of bliss and joy and it even triumphs the ecstasy of heavenly pleasures.
Keep in mind that being ambitious, working hard, making a fortune or having close interpersonal relationships are never a problem if we remain emotionally detached. Thiruvalluvar adds that real detachment happens when we develop a strong attachment to God. He says, “If you wish to renounce desires, then desire the One who is free from all desires. Once you desire him with all your passion, you will be free from all other desires.”
Perhaps, a powerful way of realising this truth is by meditating on the Cosmic Being. According to the Vedas and Upanishads, when the infinite consciousness manifested itself, it took the form of the Cosmic Being. He is without beginning, middle or end, and within Him happens all creation, preservation and destruction. As we develop our connection with the Cosmic Being, we get detached and gain strength to overcome loss.
DISCLAIMER
The views expressed in the Article above are Author’s personal views and kashmiribhatta.in is not in any way responsible for the opinions expressed in the above article. The article belongs to its respective owner or owners and this site does not claim any right over it. Copyright Disclaimer under section 107 of the Copyright Act of 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, education, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing."
Courtesy: Times of India: The Speaking Tree: TOI-ST-5 Sep, 2018
Pulkit Sharma
Dealing with loss is a daunting experience – it is something that shakes up even a usually resilient person. We struggle hard to process what happens and to come to terms with it. It is during these times that some of us become anxious, depressed and develop complex psychological disorders.
Loss is an inevitable part of life. There are testing times in life when death takes away a person we love, a once-intimate relationship becomes sour, an accident or illness debilitates our body and mind, a long-cherished dream comes crashing down, or a valued possession is snatched away from us. At such moments, we feel helpless and hopeless. It seems as if a black hole has entered our existence, and it gets tough to bounce back to life.
Thirukkural, an ancient Tamil text written almost 2,000 years ago by the sage-philosopher Thiruvalluvar, shows us a profound way to overcome loss. Thiruvalluvar does not consider human suffering to be illusory or trivial. He is empathetic, compassionate and insightful when dealing with issues such as family dynamics, social behavior, immorality, lack of self-control, emotional turmoil, romantic relationships, separation and grief. He connects to people who are at different levels of psychological and emotional maturity and encourages them to move forward. This also makes him a psychotherapist par excellence.
We are told that by becoming aware of the impermanence of various aspects of existence, we can renounce our desires and attachments and move closer to truth. On this path, we realise that a loss is an opening through which we can question our superficial sense of pleasure and pain and move towards something better.
Thiruvalluvar says that money, fortune, possessions and relationships are, by nature, ephemeral and therefore we should never form a dependency on them. We must learn to find our happiness both in their absence and in their presence by using them for collective and altruistic endeavours. Likewise, we should remember that we are not a physical body or a psychological entity, but an eternal soul and live life with this knowledge.
As we practise all this, we understand that the problem lies in our self-centeredness. When we give up our egocentric desires and false identity we reach an inner space where there is no ‘I’ or ‘mine.’ According to the sage, this state is full of bliss and joy and it even triumphs the ecstasy of heavenly pleasures.
Keep in mind that being ambitious, working hard, making a fortune or having close interpersonal relationships are never a problem if we remain emotionally detached. Thiruvalluvar adds that real detachment happens when we develop a strong attachment to God. He says, “If you wish to renounce desires, then desire the One who is free from all desires. Once you desire him with all your passion, you will be free from all other desires.”
Perhaps, a powerful way of realising this truth is by meditating on the Cosmic Being. According to the Vedas and Upanishads, when the infinite consciousness manifested itself, it took the form of the Cosmic Being. He is without beginning, middle or end, and within Him happens all creation, preservation and destruction. As we develop our connection with the Cosmic Being, we get detached and gain strength to overcome loss.
DISCLAIMER
The views expressed in the Article above are Author’s personal views and kashmiribhatta.in is not in any way responsible for the opinions expressed in the above article. The article belongs to its respective owner or owners and this site does not claim any right over it. Copyright Disclaimer under section 107 of the Copyright Act of 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, education, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing."
Courtesy: Times of India: The Speaking Tree: TOI-ST-5 Sep, 2018